In my case, type 1, my pancreas decided he wanted to retire early. Good ol’ pancre of mine decided he didn’t want to produce insulin anymore. If you're reading this, I want you to know that I am seriously jealous of your pancreas. Anyway, insulin turns foods into energy. Because I don’t produce the insulin, I inject insulin into my stomach so that I CAN turn foods into energy. People who are type 2 are insulin resistant, instead of insulin dependent. Type 2 people make insulin; however, it doesn’t function properly because of poor diet and other various things.
Eating right and exercising are the biggest factors when it comes to diabetes. Let’s start with EATING. Carb counting is a major part of eating for me. Most people ask me why I am counting the carbs and not the sugar content. Answer: Carbs=Sugars. I play a constant game of counting and balancing insulin every time I want something to eat. Here are the ever annoying steps: First, I prick my finger to find out what my blood sugars are at. From there, I give my bolus/baseline insulin which is about 11 units. The baseline insulin is long lasting insulin. Even if I am not eating, I must take the baseline when I wake up and around dinner time. When I want to eat something, I give myself another type of insulin. This insulin I inject with breakfast, lunch, dinner, and if I need it, bedtime. The amount I take depends on what my blood sugars are at. It can be anywhere from 3.5-6 units each meal/snack. Now that I have been pricked and prodded, I can finally eat something. Each meal should be roughly 45-60 grams of carbs. (This may change once I see a nutritionist, but for now I am pretty consistent with 45 grams). This basically means, for example, when I want a sandwich, I eat one slice of bread. And also means everything I absolutely love (like pasta and pizza) are only eaten in moderation. I can have it no problem…. But one serving of whole wheat spaghetti has 35 grams. Sauce has 10. And one serving is 2 oz, and NO ONE can be full off that little bit. So if I want fruit (high in sugarssssss) I add carbs to the list. Salads are low carb depending what I put in. But that spaghetti already had me at 45. So maybe I’ll give myself ½ unit more than I normally would. And thus, I balance and balance; all the while praying I balanced correctly and don’t see a huge spike or go to low.
I miss how eating use to be enjoyable. I miss going to a restaurant, looking at a menu, and picking what I want because it SOUNDS good. Not because the carb content is lower. I really hate that as soon as I order I run to the bathroom to inject my insulin. I don’t feel comfortable whipping out my pens and people thing I’m shooting up heroin. (I should probably cut back on saying things like “I need to go shoot up, be right back!”) Technically I should wait for my food to get there, because if I inject insulin and for some reason the restaurant screws up and no food comes, I’m in for a bad combo. However, I hate making whoever I am with wait to eat. So NOW, I hate that I am just starting my food when Ben is basically finished. Which is why I really would prefer to just eat at home. It’s easier to balance my carbs that way too. I know this will get easier, but for now I hate it. Especially because I am in the “trial and error” stage. Everything I eat is documented, along with how my blood sugars reacted 2 hours later. (Which means more pricking) My doctor and I are working on my insulin dose, and each time I see him my insulin dose increases. I keep hoping that once we know my dosage, things will get easier.
EXERCISE. I have a love hate relationship with the sweatabetus. Because of this insulin, I am gaining weight like crazy. And by crazy I mean 18 pounds in a month crazy. I feel huge/depressed about this subject. I KNOW I needed to gain weight back because I was under my BMI. But now I feel like I gained enough! Make it stop! Not to mention I eat sooooooooooo healthy! I work out EVERYDAY! How am I gaining and gaining?!?!?!!? Which brings me to exercise. Exercise really helps lower/balance your blood sugars. Freshman year of college I became addicted to running. After that year I didn’t care if I ever stepped foot in a gym. College life had other priorities. I started running again about two weeks ago and have become seriously addicted again. If I don’t run, I feel guilty. Which also brings me back to the fact that I work out so hard every day and only get bigger……. Again. Love. Hate. Relationship. Another experience I am faced with is becoming low after I work out. Being low sucks. I get super tired, shaky and can’t concentrate on anything. What I hate most about this? I use to love the way I would feel after a run. Now I’m exhausted and shaky. I feel like those good feeling endorphins never hit me.
Now that I've whined enough for today, I’ll end with something positive. Even though the beetus SUCKS right now, I’ve always wanted to actually stick to the New Year’s resolution of 1. Being Healthy & 2. Exercise more. Since my life basically depends on these two things… it’s safe to say I’ll finally stick to it.
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